Navigating the Transition to Motherhood
Once I became a mother I realized first hand that being a mother is at times difficult at best. A mother’s job does not stop at the end of a long day; there are no sick days or days off. I often call it the second shift. Sometimes, mothers need extra support in the transition to motherhood. New mothers are often trying to navigate the excitement of being a new mom, sleep disturbances, body image issues, changes in relationships, and sometimes depression and anxiety.
There is an enormous feeling of relief and gratitude, once the delivery is over. After months of waiting and apprehension, when the child is born healthy, the sense of fulfillment is immense. However, the first few weeks, even months after childbirth, with the baby can be confusing and emotionally draining. The postpartum period begins after the delivery of the baby and ends when the mother’s body has returned as closely as possible to its pre-pregnant state. This period usually lasts six to eight weeks.
During this time new moms need to take care of themselves. The saying “it takes a village” should be embodied during this important time. Surround yourself with people who support you. Create your own personal momtourage. Your health, both physical and psychological, is undergoing a healing process after delivery.
Learn to accept help. It can be overwhelming and some new mothers have difficulty with the pressures of having a new baby. This is also the reason why they become irritable and crabby. As much as the newborn requires care and comfort, so does the new mother. There is no shame in asking for help. You are not weak or less of a mother in doing so.
Sleep when the baby sleeps. If you are not resting, you will not be able to care for your child. According to the National Sleep Foundation, the average adult needs seven to nine hours of sleep every night. When you sleep only a couple of hours a night on an ongoing basis, you build up a “sleep debt” that can be hard to pay back. If your sleep debt persists over time, your health can suffer. A parent loses about 350 hours of sleep at night over her baby’s first year. Napping is a great way to catch up on sleep. If you’ve gone awhile without getting good-quality rest, the sleep you do get — even during a nap — will become more effective.
You must sleep when the baby is sleeping so your body can be replenished and rejuvenated so that you can keep providing care for your child.
In addition to accepting help and getting enough rest, new moms must make the adjustment from pre-baby body to post – baby body. The frame you were use to seeing in the mirror has been replaced by the aftermath of carrying and bringing forth a life. Don’t fret, with proper nutrition and exercise you will start to recognize yourself again. It’s important to realize that your body is going through a major adjustment; it has been pushed to the limit so you want to be kind to your body and not add the extra stress of a strict diet and exercise. Everything should be done in moderation and under the advice of your doctor. Be gentle with yourself. Give yourself healthy food and snacks throughout the day. Drink plenty of water; it’s imperative to stay hydrated, because you may not feel like eating all the time. Take your baby out for a walk; enjoy the fresh air and the beautiful surrounding. You will see that if you are consistent, your body will begin to make the journey back to what once was, or better.
Take care of yourself.
If you feel you are suffering from postpartum depression or anxiety please contact your doctor
Ayana Rose is a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist. She has been practicing as a clinician for over 7 years. She works with individual, couples, children/teens and families. Areas of special interest include working with new mothers or mothers to be, blended and step families, individuals going through a “life transition”, lowering stress levels and those suffering from depression.
Ayana Rose, M.S LMFT #48356
818-920-8255 (TALK)
ayanacamara@gmail.com